When you’re on your way to work do you feel guilty for leaving your children?
Then guilty at work because you’re only part time and can’t get as much done.
You need to do a tonne of things but they are pulling at your trousers saying in the most divine voice ever, “Mummy do you want to play with me?”
Definition of guilt by me, “Big ugly stringy mess that tugs at your heart strings, like a dark version of Mister Tickle but more arms and less smile”
Actual definition of guilt by Oxford dictionary, “A feeling of having committed wrong or failed in an obligation”
Guilt is great if it’s appropriate. If you have hurt someone, gossiped about a friend, been rude to your partner then guilt wakes you up to that and hopefully encourages you to make amends.
I’m talking about the guilt we get when we haven’t done anything wrong we are just trying to muddle through life and keep everything in balance.
We could spend some time psychoanalysing where our guilt comes from. Freud certainly comes up with some interesting suggestions (see the link below). But I really don’t think you have the time right now.
So instead do what I’ve done.
My immediate plan has been to accept that my life will contain a certain amount of guilt. I focus on keeping that at a manageable level.
I let myself off the hook all the time and you can too.
A jar of ready made baby food is ok. Oven pizza instead of freshly prepared food is a life saver. Growing your own veg is not essential neither is owning your own chickens. Children being covered in mud and insisting on wearing their superman outfit to school will amuse everyone else. Crying like a baby as you leave your youngest at nursery for the first time while you go to work is your right as a mother.
You are a good person, you don’t deserve to be carrying a huge load of guilt around with you.
Just let it go….at least most of it!
If you don’t you’ll end up stressed, overwhelmed, and depressed.
It’s okay if your guilt gets you to the 6 chairs but don’t win the guilt factor!
If you’ve realised your guilt factor is too much and you want help restoring some balance in your life please contact me for your free coaching session.
I’d love to hear from you. firstname.lastname@example.org
Then join me at www.facebook.com/nicolahughescoaching for latest musings on life.
Love Nicola x x
Ps if you want to read more about guilt there are some articles here.