In my Blog “Return to work – No you can’t.” https://nicolahughescoaching.wordpress.com/2015/11/15/return-to-work-no-you-cant/
I describe stepping into work like stepping onto an elevator. It doesn’t stop, it keeps moving just like your job has while you’ve been away. And when you have stepped on you got a jolt as you readjust.
The jolt onto an elevator is small.
You might not even notice it.
This Blog is about my Jolt as I step back into work.
IT IS NOT A SMALL JOLT!!
It’s a great big ruddy jolt that’s left me shouting, “Who took my life, I’ll have it back now please!!”
Ok, I’ll stop being a drama queen.
But here is a little context. I am writing this after day two at work. I work two days a week. I have two children. The childcare is a mix of grandma, childminder and preschool. We had a horrible double dose of chicken pox the week before and some family issues that wiped me out.
And hello work.
I loved being at work. I talked to adults without interruption from small people, I made a cuppa when I wanted and drank it before it went cold, I only had to feed myself at lunch time and no one followed me to the toilet and shouted, “Don’t make a loud noise mummy!” (The biggest pickle says this when we are in public toilets and he’s referring to the hand dryer that he’s scared to death of BUT he always says it when I’m sat on the public toilet and not when I’m washing my hands which in my mind would be a much more appropriate time to make his request! Ruddy kids!)
I still feel a little wobbly about the actual job I am doing and I wonder if I can remember how to do it. Plus the system has dramatically changed and I know I’m going to get frustrated with that. But I have an inner peace and good support at work and I know it will be fine.
What could possibly go wrong?
I thought the jolt I would experience was stepping through the office door. No, that was fun. The jolt was stepping in my front door when I got back. I had been gone all day. I didn’t know what had gone on, who needed what. It felt like trying to jump onto a very fast moving train. In truth it probably looked like any usual evening in the Hughes residence. But I didn’t know what to do?
I felt surplus – no one needed me
I felt guilty – I didn’t know what my children needed
I felt jealous – Someone else knew what they wanted
I felt trapped – I didn’t know how to make it right or at least workable.
I felt hungry – I didn’t know when I was going to eat my tea
I did what any self-respecting woman on a mission to be more fulfilled would do.
I planned my escape!!
I thought I’d get a new job and work 12 hours straight so I could avoid all of this. I thought I could change my childcare arrangements, I could quit my job and eat beans on toast for life.
Then, (a few days later)
I realised that I hadn’t given much thought to anyone else. So I asked and I kept asking.
I strongly but kindly said I wasn’t okay with some things. I set boundaries.
I offered possibilities. I was flexible.
We stated the obvious. We all need feeding.
We allocated jobs.
We said we would keep trying.
I enter Week 2 of work much happier.
So what is your Jolt? Are you living it right now? Or are you waiting and dreading and guessing what it will be?
Whatever it is and however you are feeling if you need help I know I can help you.
You don’t need to dread it. Just imagine how much easier it will be to have someone who understands walking along side you through it.
And if you’re living the jolt right now and can’t see a way out. There will be.
Whatever the situation you are in, if you can’t see the wood for the trees and want some help getting out or to find a new perspective get in touch with me at Contact@nicolahughes.co.uk and we can arrange a
FREE introductory Coaching Session for you.
When you have done that get on Facebook and like my page www.fb.com/nicolahughescoaching so you can keep up to date with my musings and information.
Lots of love to you