I lost my job!

i-lost-my-job

In January 2016 I set some goals. One of them was that by January 2017 I would be successfully self-employed and out of the job I used to love but now no longer found fulfilling or enjoyable.

I continued in the day job but worked my self-employed socks off at the same time.

Then by about Easter I decided that was a stupid idea because we were embarking on a house extension, I decided to keep my eldest out of school for an extra year (that’s a whole other blog post story – stressful and emotional is an understatement) AND I thought it would be better to wait until the youngest was getting some free childcare hours.

So I continued to be unfulfilled in the day job.

I continued to dream big dreams for our future but didn’t act on much as we were mostly surrounded by dust.

Then I was called to a meeting. One that was headed, “Restructure.”

About 8 long weeks later I am sat at my kitchen table as a fully self-employed person. No day job in sight. It is November 2016!  I have 8 weeks to become successful to achieve my goal.

There’s a few things I have learnt over the last few weeks.

I owned my Redundancy.  There was a process but it was inevitable that I would be made redundant and I didn’t want ‘making’ redundant so I requested that I take voluntary redundancy. I was choosing this. No one was doing it to me. So when the process got hard I couldn’t blame ‘them’. I chose this.  It’s so important to own your stuff. We go around blaming people for harming us or getting in the way.

I don’t like the word “Redundant”. It’s a horrid word meaning, not needed, jobless, of no use anymore. In the grand scheme of things of course I was needed and useful but in this context within this role I wasn’t. That’s okay. But it made me feel deskilled and worthless for a while so I needed to look after myself.  I took some time off and did a lot of thinking. I also ran. Running helps me process things and releases stress.

I need to mull it over. Today is officially the first day of self-employed life.  I have a list as long as my arm of things to do but I feel a little disabled. I’m still in transition and that is okay.  I need to sort out my thoughts and close down my old life.  This takes time and it shouldn’t be rushed. I’m not happy about this. I’d like to get over it and crack on!

I’m not going to get a Christmas party! I’m not a huge fan of work Christmas parties but that’s not the point. I don’t have a team to celebrate with or an excuse to put a pretty frock on.  When I first told my team at work what was happening I told them not to feel sorry for me but to congratulate me and celebrate with me as I was being released into my future.   The reality is that the party is just one event. I’m in this for my life and my family’s life.  Being self-employed isn’t for everyone (and I’m not convinced yet that it’s for me) but it is for everyone to have a life that they feel in control of and enjoy.

No one is going to arrange a Christmas knees up for me but I can put my party frock on whenever I want.

So as we enter this festive season please raise your glasses with me,

“Here is to our lives, the lives we love, the lives we create and the choices we make!”

Watch this space as I’ll be announcing all the exciting things I plan to do soon.

In the mean time spread the word www.nicolahughes.co.uk and www.fb.com/nicolahughescoaching is well and truly open for business!!

If you’re struggling to celebrate your life or make the right choices get in touch with me at contact@nicolahughes.co.uk

Lots of love

Nicola x

New Year, New You?…..Nah!

The Best way to be you

Do you feel bombarded with adverts asking you to become the new you?

Do you feel guilty thinking you must make some new year’s resolutions but wonder what the point is as you know they won’t last long?

Do you know something needs to change but don’t know what?

New Year is a great time of year for Coaches, Fitness Instructors, diet gurus and the like to jump on the bandwagon that a New Year marks a New Start.

It annoys me actually. Really really annoys me if I think about it too much.

Give up smoking.  Lose weight. Start a fitness regime. Not bad suggestions really.

But selling you a new YOU like you are an old car and need replacing is, in my books NOT on!

Do you remember Trinny and Susannah? The gusty style gurus. Never once did they tell anyone to lose weight or run more. They worked with what they had and made massive differences to people’s confidence.

They would grab a fat bulgy behind of some poor woman, tell her she was fabulous and choose a pair of trousers that showed off this fabulous feature. All the while this woman had been hiding in baggy jumpers as she was so embarrassed and probably tried every diet under the sun.

She didn’t have to change.

She was believed in and nurtured and she grew in confidence. (She also had two brash women grab her behind)

She found her best way to be herself.

I’m not sure where the story ends but my fantasy is that she had the confidence to go for her dream job or call the guy she’d been secretly admiring.

I want this for you. I know you are flawed. I know there are things about yourself you don’t like, things you do, attitudes you have, hobbies you should start, practices you should take up.

I’m not inviting you to transform yourself and become this new you in 6 easy steps.

I’m inviting you to be the same you (because you really are marvellous) but more defined.

We get so obsessed about being thinner, or funnier or well thinner. I always want to be thinner, not a size 6 thin but thinner. Then one day I had this revelation that the scales didn’t predict my future. I could be all the things I wanted to be and achieve all the amazing things I wanted to do regardless of my size. (I don’t want to be a Britain’s Next Top Model by the way– which is just as well)

I need two things:

Confidence in myself & Belief in myself

So my invitation to you is this;

Do you want me to help you FIND YOUR BEST WAY TO BE YOURSELF?

I know you are frustrated, I know you don’t always know what this frustration is about, I know you are not sure what you would say to me or where to start.

But I know these three things.

  1. I know how to connect with you
  2. I know how to bring out the BEST in you that is hiding or hasn’t been discovered yet
  3. I know you can live the more fulfilling life you dream of.

Will you walk with me?

Will you talk to me?

Email me at contact@nicolahughes.co.uk and we will arrange your FREE Coaching Session. There is no hard sell, just a simple explanation of what I offer and the rest is over to you so you can try me out.

I have limited spaces so book in early to avoid disappointment.

I can’t wait to hear from you.

New Year New You? Nah

You are already fabulous you just need to FIND YOUR BEST WAY TO BE YOURSELF

Lots of love,

Nicola x x